Things I Enjoyed In My Youth For Reasons I Don’t Understand Now

Or what the heck was i thinking?

Some trends should be left in the fashion vault. September 18, 2008

Filed under: Fashion — deannabanana @ 10:36 pm
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Katie Holmes, I’m looking in your direction.

 

Why, God, Why?

Why, God, Why?

Nothing sends me back to middle school more than this look which I pray DOES NOT CATCH ON.  DO YOU HEAR ME, PEOPLE?  DON’T LET THIS SPREAD.

I did this until about the eighth grade when I finally realized how stupid it looked.  I can understand pegging (or as we called it, French cuffing) your jeans if you are going out into the deep woods and you don’t want anything to crawl up your legs.  But see that pic on the left?  That, invariably, would happen throughout the day — at least one leg would come loose and you’d have to do it up again.  It adds up to a waste of valuable boy-watching time.  

Thankfully, it seems from my sister’s magazines (I refuse to buy my own copies of US Weekly or Star) that this was labeled a DON’T.  I’m blaming the thetans.

 

Maybe the world is blind… September 15, 2008

Filed under: Fashion,TV — deannabanana @ 10:24 pm
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Or maybe just I was.  How else could you explain my wanting to dress like this:

This is definitely in the annals of “What Was I Thinking?”  Also, thank God my mother had some sense.

Granted I was eight when Punky Brewster first aired.  Granted she was abandoned by her mom and perhaps that was the excuse for the fact that she dressed like a colorblind homeless person.  But really?  Two different colored Converse?  A bandana tied around the knee?  What was it supposed to do there, anyway?  Serve as a tourniquette?  How did it stay up?  It wasn’t for another ten years that I realized that wearing one pant leg up had gang connotations.  Were we supposed to think this live-action Rainbow Brite was hardcore?

Of course, this show also introduced us to the star of another cheesy late 80s show:

 

Wow, you’re hot! September 8, 2008

Filed under: Fashion — deannabanana @ 11:04 pm
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And everyone knew it when you wore this:

A Hypercolor T-shirt

A Hypercolor T-shirt

For some reason in the very early 90s, it became cool to wear Hypercolor.  This was one of those fads that came and went rather quickly and with good reason.  Some sort of chemical was in the fabric that would cause the shirt to change color in response to heat.  This sounds cool in theory.  HOWEVER, your armpits would inevitably be bright pink so not only would it look like you had a sweating problem but that maybe you had some sort of glandular problem that turned your perspiration neon.  Also, if you had bosoms (and Lord knows I did), that whole area would change color.  It was basically a neon sign telling all passers-by “Look at my boobs!”

Which leads me to my next point.  Because I really was sort of innocent when I got the shirt (mine was an azalea color that turned a bright orangy pink).  I had no idea that people would see the shirt as carte blanche to grope you.  I would walk down the hallways in middle school and random people that I did not know would just come up to me and grab me in random places and say (afterward) “Does this really work?”  I wasn’t sure how I felt about that.  A combination of excited and appalled at the same time, I think.

After a while the color stopped working and then it wasn’t fun any more.

Apparently they made Hypercolor shorts (according to Wikipedia).  I can’t understand why that didn’t take off.  I mean, who wouldn’t want to walk around with a neon crotch?